Believe it or not, life just isn't so perverse that finding a beautiful moment to surrender in is incapable. There is so much ugliness in us, so much hatred and cruelty, discomfort and ackwardness. We can't just accept, we can't be righteous without lesson. The unbelievable amount of despair I relieze in this is paralyzing. Rushing though daily responsibilities, one to the next and the next and the next, while the moments disappear without feeling them. It's waste. Faceplanting in the cement seems necessary to shake the numbness from the absence of life that passes by. And yet there is so much life. It feels so hard to recognize, so disconnected. Lost completely in our own lives, the encompassing beauty of the world dissipates unnoticed. We are each a moment, and our moment has the capacity to evolve, to be beautiful, and to be our own. I fear that in most of us it is abused or unrealized. Sometimes it is so hard to remember ourselves that grasping at the surrounding creation is an increadible thought. And I know that I, like everyone else, am just a blush of nature. I sigh when I remember that I am not lost. And it's because I don't remember ever knowing myself.

  posted by cake masher @ 9:46 PM